“My great-granmother’s step-brother’s uncle-in-law’s half daughter died from driving into a lake due to advanced Glorpmans, and I found this whole thing to be gravely offensive. I hope you and your gang of little pricks get a chunk of Red caught in your self-centred throats.”

the one that threw me once (the guy that grabbed it back) was even weirder if you were anywhere BUT a theme park/tourist destination. i worked at walt disney world and the guy got my in the merchandise location - open access with a counter.

Yeah, and that’s just for the pics of delicious food he puts at the top of every BCO.

I think there should be a t-shirt that just says “Dammit, Pinkham!”

Ugh I was in Safeway one time and a few lines away from me there was an old lady arguing about change or something in the express line to a young East Indian Cashier. Anyhow, eventually she said something racist and the entire line hissed and booed her, but the best part was there was an old man in the line who stood…

Well of course! They had a fantastic season that year! Many of Ralph Lauren...’Ugo Boss...

To me, a poached egg was one that was caught in a snare, on a not to bright night. And then you would stuff it down your pants and run silently though the dark forest for half a mile. When you ate your poached egg, you always chucked the last bit and the shell to the lurcher that had been silently by your side all…

I hope these people were invited...

i do still get extra nice treatment at my local home depot after the ranting customer in the garden center once turned around and asked me to validate his commitment to the idea that the cashier have all the SKU’s for patio stones memorized after he’d been calling her stupid for two minutes solid. i told him he was…

The Tito’s/Tanqueray thing reminds me of this time back in my mid-20s when I went to this party my then-roommate’s friends were throwing. I didn’t really know the people at this party, but there was free booze, so whatever. I’m making random small talk with this dude who, it became quickly apparent, was a total…

There’s a special section in heaven reserved for people who have had to deal with old people arguing over change.

This is why you don’t go chasing waterfalls. Please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you’re used to.

I hope your asshole writes a bestseller countering all of your dick’s accusations, and that the two of them become embroiled in a decades-long media feud.

Well, that may happen if you eat gluten.

I'm fairly certain the woman who drove into the lake also suffers from Glorpman's, although hers appears to be a more severe case, everyone knows severe advanced Glorpmans turns you in to a raving bitch. You should be more considerate!

“you’ve never worked with the general public before.”

I’ve been working with General Public so long, he was just Lieutenant Public when I got started.

“How dare you mock the guy for not knowing what the beach is? Some people make it to age 50 without visiting the beach and somehow completely missing the ever-present representations of beaches in popular culture. Besides, many people suffer from Glorpman’s Syndrome, which is an inability to understand the…

HOw DARE you!!!!!!!

Now, Muy, this kind of reasoned, evidence-based commentary with rational and progressive conclusions just doesn't belong on the internet. Take a little time to read the hyperbole and vicious attacks so that you start getting a sense of how people talk to each other around the internet. Maybe, try making up facts and…