....can we have Grierson and Leitch back, please?

“We paid $400M up front in cash for a hostage ransom. That’s why people are shitting on Obama.”

You may need this.

It’s in the media village, so they clearly did their research and discovered zero is the number of condoms most reporters will need.

Yeah man, they’ve totally moved past it! They fired the football coach and the assistant to the traveling secretary in the athletic department. What more do you want from them!

This is my favorite basketball camp attendee humilation:

Hahahahahaha... wait, it could work out.

Tim Lee is “going to embrace God’s plan.”

Then you are dumb as fuck. Thanks for commenting.

“I didn’t put it in front of winning, but I think we all have things that we have to do. There has to be a line somewhere, and that’s what ended up happening.”

This is a very bad take.

Seriously? Larry Fedora? Did Mike Vape take a job elsewhere?

Not in North Carolina you won’t, Mister!!

Reminds of that time I was trying to take a routine shit in the toilet and I misjudged it and shit directly into my own mouth.

This is America dammit. Call it socser so we don’t get it confused with our real sports.

I’m pissed off now, Jobu. Look, I go to you. I stick up for you. You no help me now. I say “Fuck you Jobu”, I do it myself.

I mean, heavens forbid they actually use that technology to figure out where a punt goes out of bounds so the refs don’t walk it back up an extra 10 yards, it’s not like I’m bitter about that or anything.

Funny, my wife asked for much the same thing.

OH FUCK YEAH JUST PLUG THAT SHIT STRAIGHT INTO MY VEINS IT’S SO GOOD.

The victim’s details have not yet been released. All we know is that his name is Richard, but he goes by Dick.