Does your phone not have auto-correct, though? I tried typing in all the errors you made and my phone corrected every single one of them... I know you write for Jezebel and not some "more important" news outlet, but don't be CNN, dude. Timeliness is not an excuse for sloppiness. If you're as good as I think you are…

2000 Chris Pratt for the shark in Jaws!

It's more that the anatomical impossibility is there solely to make the insane butt-presented-in-the-air-while-nightmarishly-splitting-in-half phenomenon possible. Sure, poses that are anatomically dubious show up in comics all the time, but in comics about male superheroes, it's there to convey dexterity,…

but does he have an epic slow-motion running scene? DOES HE?

The weird thing is that "fucking a butcher shop window" by no means turned me off just now. But then again, I *really* like meat.

My first vibrator was found behind my childhood bed by my father after I had lost it there while visiting for Christmas with my boyfriend at the time. He's as conservative as they come, so it went immediately into the garbage, Hera having nothing to do with it.

Oh, it's so rough for you all. Now just imagine seeing blood on and coming out of your nether-regions for nearly a quarter of your whole life. Boo freaking hoo.

I'd rather listen to Rob Ford. Not to mention the fact that on him, the puffy skirt would be epic!

That is one of the best goddamn models of love/sex I've ever considered. I applaud your friend, and you by extension.