“Rizzo pretty clearly didn’t deviate from his path here...”

I live on a hill in Los Angeles where there are many bikers of the MAMIL variety. There is this one guy named Keith who starts at the bottom of the hill in San Pedro riding a city bike wearing boots, jorts, and no shirt. He powers past the guys decked out in lycra. I have even heard the other bicyclists mutter…

I wish I could upvote this more than once..

I so incredibly hope so. For all his stupidity, he’s one slipper slimy bastards.

The “deep state spear” is Newt’s biggest fear and the terror that keeps him up at night: A big ol’ gay liberal dong that thrusts deep into the ‘Murican dream and pumps it full of rainbows and compassion. Oh! And the dong is black, and thinks that women should be allowed to vote.

Winner gets Brock Lesnar at Summerslam

I’ll go watch in my neighborhood sports bar, so at least I can have the pride of saying “I didn’t pay—sort of.” I will of course have to face the Walk of Shame afterwards, but it will be dark, so hopefully no one recognizes me.

I’m just hoping that McGregor loses his bearings, gets confused about where he is, and kicks Mayweather in the face, right before being DQ’ed.

I already ordered the PPV 6 months ago from a legitimate looking Nigerian version of Showtime. Cost me $5,000, but I’ll get that back and then some when the Sultan unfreezes his inhertance.

I’ll pay. I’ll watch. I’ll be embarrassed the next morning that I did either.

Why is gizmodo so obsessed with the shit bike that Ikea makes? I’m a fan of a lot of their furniture but if you are going to spend that much on a bike, you can do so much better from a company that focuses on bikes. Even better if you support a local bike shop who will build the bike for you for free when you buy it…

I think the most astounding part of this product launch is that Apple does NOT seem to have claimed that they “invented” anything with the HomePod.

This is very good advice, but I wonder...why are some of us this way? Is it something we’re born with? The result of some traumatic incident in childhood? I’d really like to know.

I so needed to read this today. I’m that person. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve told a joke in the middle of a conversation that was not well received and I worried all day if those people were offended, or they didn’t like me anymore, etc. It’s exhausting picking at every little thing. I’ll try this.

I just want you filthy people to wash your legs. We’ll worry about scents at a later date.

Darn, I was hoping for an infographic to show what different symbols meant

I really want a job as an influencer. I recommend fruit flavored seltzer water, mixed breed dogs, never wearing shoes with Velcro, and Fun Dip Lik-a-Stix. Does anyone feel influenced? Give me a dollar.

When are they going to use it to push products? Seems like the logical next step.

So they’re taking the “stop hitting yourself” defense against Dao? Seems legit.

(unintelligible screaming)