All of those women/people either:

I don’t think I could have rolled my eyes harder without harming them.

Kesha album produced by Timbaland. Boom, the world just exploded from awesomeness.

ANN PERKINS

Not today, because I’m all tied up with speedwalking everywhere and eating cats!

For everyone standing around looking at what the GOP has become even just since 2012 going “How the fuck could this happen?” Which, I think, is most of us, in both parties. I don’t think even with the rise of the Tea Party since 2009 prepared us for how frankly weird things have gotten.

I already did that today.

Your reply is too rational for the Internet. Please report to 4chan for remedial training.

egg?

Mmmm. I do not let them have police toys either

We should also require that all jizz socks be buried as abandoned potential children and provided with at least $5.00 child support.

I’d like to quote your entire post on FB. Shall I just attribute it to your handle?

they might not be assholes, but i wonder if they’re commenting on other websites talking about assholes and mentioning you.

“Now that he’s been born, he better attach some boot straps to that oxygen tank”

and “thoughts”, don’t forget “thoughts”

That is a hilariously accurate statement. Jesus fucking wept.

Now that he’s been born, he better attach some boot straps to that oxygen tank or he’s just a no good dirty moocher sucking down that sweet Medicaid money from the real Murrican taxpayers.

That’s a little outlandish. It’s not like he shot a black kid or anything.

Considering how that crowd rolls, kid's gonna have to make due with prayers.

This one is my favorite: