I suppose anything goes, as long as you rim the glass with crushed RU486.

All I can picture is Hunter S. Thompson tripping balls and stumbling around a bridal expo now: "Oh shit, I think they're onto me. I've got to get out of here but they've hidden the door in a layer of tulle so deep I can taste it and one of the rabid weasels in attendance keeps trying to take out my eye with a…

Totally of topic but your story at the beginning just reminded me of when me and my sister used to pretend to get married.

I started drinking more quickly, because both love and terrorism make me nervous.

Reviewing a Nicholas Sparks’ movie is like shooting fish in a barrel that have already been shot. But only after a long, love affair in which they wrote letters to one another that never reached each other because the mail service in a barrel is horrible.

Oh, go screw. This post was written by a Christian. It's possible to insert humor in an article about this stuff without "mocking" it, and if you can't take some gentle joking about it, that's your problem, not mine.

I kind of like that. Gives me a chance to chat with the other industry vets before the onslaught of idiots, if I choose. (Or if I'm spoiling for a fight, I can wait, click "show pending," and scroll to the bottom.)

Attack people. They attack people.

I think the Pickle-Tip guy was a malfunctioning outer space robot from Mars. See, he heard, "Don't take any wooden nickles," and then glitched it into "don't take any wooden pickles," and then misinterpreted that to mean "The earth-humans demand gifts of pickles plaaced upon the wooden table. I have pleases Emperor…

One time when I was outside of a Cheesecake Factory smoking a cigarette a man propositioned me thinking I was a hooker.

Me during the popcorn story

Pictured left: A breadstick plantation in rural Georgia.

There might be a ton of questions here, but I find they can all be wrapped together into one simple sentence.

Kumar's Tandoori Grill is a proud sponsor of the 2022 FIFA World Cup.

I think the larger question is how will he balance career and family?

Here's the thing, have you ever done it?

How many times can it be said that if you can afford to eat out, you can fucking afford to tip? Not enough times, apparently. Jeebus. I love to tip. I loooooove it. I feel frickin' righteous about it. Sometimes, I tip my barista FIFTY percent, btw, even though she or he has spent a mere 60 seconds on my dirty chai tea…