What is a luxury horse? Does it have upgrades that standard horses don't have—-gold plating or leather exterior?

My birthday is Saturday but I can't do anything because I've been sentenced to bed rest by my doctor. I guess I won't have a chance to be a jackass or be around any jackasses. Damn. However, I do plan to catch up on Parks and Rec and Flight of the Conchords, so the day will not be totally in vain.

@Divagatious: Aaahhhh—-mine is on Saturday too! It's Harry Potter's birthday too so that makes it even better (the character, not the actor). Happy birthday to you!

@Vixen5: That stuff would kill at DEB. Is that store still around?

I can't even see the name Barbara Boxer without the mental image of Jon Hamm as Sen. Scott Brown in his underpants. I do not mind this association at all....

@Lady formerly of the Bananas: Socks protect their modesty!

@lynbird: Directed by Tim Burton?

@dirtybee: It's the eyebrow raise...gives me the vapors!

@CissyPants: Melanoma?

@Vivi21: Mark Wahlberg talks to Animals...i.e a jackass.

@quatrevingtquatre: I would hire her on a transAtlantic flight as a secondary floatation device, but weddings...?

Aren't you supposed to bang two sticks together to ward off the gays? Or was that mountain lions? I can never remember.

@MissMollyKate: I think when you sell your soul to Satan you don't have to eat or sleep anymore, but I'm not 100% sure.

@moonbird: A duet with Toby Keith would really bring it home...

@vamusical: Hmm....who could David Krumholtz play? The Penguin?

Arrested Development movie? YES

I was not a crier at all and pretty much was a jackass to those that are until I had my son. Now I'm a quivery mess whenever a Save the Children ad comes on or a "very special episode" of anything.

@FrostyTempleton: The only way I can make it through those damn ASPCA commercials is remembering the SNL skit with Seth Meyers and Abby Elliott..."This dog's house is in foreclosure...this dog is a single mother..."

@KiloTangoBravo: Don't forget 2 epic SNL episodes...If such a station existed I would cancel DishNetwork in a heartbeat.

@badmutha: Yes, but is it a REVENGE fever? The hotness only counts if it's for revenge.