I nearly fell off my rolling chair laughing.

It looks like she’s pooping that cotton ball out. Who helped her style this photo? Who took it? Who was her enabler? A good friend would look her in the eye and say “giiiiiirrrrrl, get it together’

Who do you think she got to take the photo?

Yellow and pink eye makeups make me appear to have avian flu.

But it’s such a fun way to end the week!

I just snorted.

See, this is what the republicans are always trying to say: pull those bootstraps harder, this is American, anyone can succeed.

And more acid-wash.

How in the hell can you enforce someone not being allowed to see a therapist unless the therapist signs an NDA?!?!?!?! A therapist isn’t supposed to discuss patient care unless it’s in relation to immediate risk to someone, so inherent in the demand is the knowledge that a therapist would likely feel compelled to…

He covets her more than any other person, but I don’t think more than his own skin.

For all the claims of loyalty Trump demands, he’d push his precious Ivanka down the stairs before risking his own ass. Cohen’s days are numbered and I hope he’s not too stupid to realize it.

I have been commenting since Jez started and I’m down to a dribble, between some sort of Kinja glitch I get logged out and have to go back in through the Kinja main page, the articles have been mediocre lately and the conversation isn’t there anymore

This is the gif version of my soul at all times.

It’s Hollywood on European spring break. Enough said.

I need a shame shower.

After Columbine (when I was in HS) a lot of schools talked about/made kids have clear back packs and all the girls were like ‘um, I don’t want the world to seem my tampons’. Once they started down the road of makeup bags, they realized clear bags were dumb.

On the rare occasions I watch SNL, weekend update is soooooo bad. No chemistry. No riffs, just awkward card reading.

Every time I see Pirro, I mentally replace her with Sally Langston from Scandal.

My 20 month old has better listening skills

A porn star is truly the hero this country deserves right now.