The Trump presidency is so depressing/unbelievable/terrifying with all these conflicts and it hasn’t even started yet.

I think he’s surrounding himself with family members like any paranoid mobster would.

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

I don’t know, he’s 89. Shaky fingers?

Except they own neither of those things they’re not poors. They own the poors who own those things.

......the team is even prepping nominees for questions on quotidian transactions like the price of milk or a gallon of gas —

It is so hard when I seamen who don’t agree with me that I just get so angry.

Take a bow for that one.

I’m not the prowed one here.

You catamoron

That’s a little stern, don’t you think?

Maybe one of these days I will come about.

Schooner or later, you’ll appreciate these nautical puns.

It was a Titanic display.

I feel like there was something here I didn’t ketch.

Just skipper over it next time.

This actually looked like it was going to be a good game, until the Giants were capsized by that Hail Mary toss to end the first half.

Damn it Petchesky. I’m tired of your junk.

This should really set the standard for any more boat takes this season. Any article should contain a minimum of five puns about boats, sailing, etc.

COURIER. DICTATE EVERYTHING, SEND BY COURIER.