Wait a second... those words sound alike... THOSE WORDS SOUND ALIKE!!!! I think there is a new form of humor in the works here.

I would like to believe that thong is the collective noun for strippers, like an ambush of tigers or a pitying of turtledoves.

I have baked more than I ever have before. I even broke out recipes I have not made since I was a kid, like pineapple filled cookies, and I made boozy fruitcakes, with a a dozen or so dried fruits in it. I have to stop, but it seems worse each day. Today I made lemon bars.

it turned out to be a payphone at a bar in Maine, and the guy was apparently a regular who’d get hammered every night and then call Senator Clinton’s office to rant violently at her.

Wikileaks followed that up with a threat to doxx all verified accounts on Twitter.

his on air partner James Wetback is on slightly shakier ground

C’mon Dude, eventually she’ll get sick of her little game and, you know, wander on back. 

no

oh, what they wont do for a stiff, those lovely ladies.

...it’s just what he believes. He’s entitled to that.

I do not wear it, but I did wear it when I was pregnant. In my defense, this was a loooong time ago when ultrasounds weren’t so ubiquitous (I only had one because they thought I might have twins).

We had a 3d one recently (I’m currently 6 days overdue with the already most obstinate human in utereo) and my husband quipped how much he looked like a family member and all I could say was how much he looked like a lasagna! The look of horror on the tech’s face was priceless.

I hope McCain gives into that impulse at every turn for the next four years.

You forgot coal! We need to burn coal! There’s a war on coal totally unrelated to advancements in fracking technology.

Wanna know how hard it was to make out my ultrasound? My aunt ended up drawing a hat and smiley face on my ass (and a note dubbing me “Baby Herman” for some reason) because they couldn’t tell which end was the head.

Like I legit don’t get the reasoning behind these bills other than to be a complete waste of everyone’s time. Do they think women don’t know what a pregnancy is? That somehow an ultrasound is going to change someone’s mind? If it were me, I’d be like “yep, thanks for confirming I’m preggers, let’s get this clump of…

My youngest looked like the crypt keeper in one. IT. WAS. AWESOME!

I’m currently pregnant and at my 20 week ultrasound the tech was going nuts trying to get me to have some sort of overjoyed reaction. “Look at the cute little hand! There’s the stomach! Isn’t that darling?” You can barely tell what you are looking at!!!

“I do enjoy the baseketball rings myself” - Ted Cruz