First rule of parenthood-these ungrateful, adorable little tyrants DO NOT GIVE A FUCK how crunchy you are, or what your plans are, or how ethically you plan to raise them. This is how people get all stressed the fuck out. You plan to cosleep? Ha ha, baby has terrible reflux and has to sleep in the car seat. Allergies…

“I want advice so I can ignore it and still complain about my problem.”

💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩

As someone who was only able to access emojis beginning a few years ago, and now uses them obsessively like someone’s dorky aunt (which I am), there can never be too many emojis.

I’m sorry that tweet is hilarious.

I don’t say this often, but

I like this color.

D.B. Pooper

I have a friend who is very much in the homemaker-wife-of-a-director-who-can-spend-$3000-a-day-if-she-wants category.

I have a friend who is very much in the homemaker-wife-of-a-director-who-can-spend-$3000-a-day-if-she-wants category.

This is the first time I’ve ever heard of this person.

A completely anecdotal story (obviously):

Why the fuck would you WANT to neutralize your stomach acid?! I need that shit to digest my food!!!

I stopped reading at “severe food poisoning twice a year.” I’m an eater of sketchy food (both old and purchased at dirty places). I have only had food poisoning ONCE (Mongolian BBQ). So, I call either bullshit or too dim to have worthwhile insight. Twice a damn year? For how many years? What the fuck are you eating?…

Preach. I’m not sitting down and having my waistband hit my (rather small) tits EVER AGAIN!

I’d say they’re looking to see if you can problem-solve at all: Throw a non-job-domain problem at you and learn how you approach a problem and hear you reason your way through it using common sense:

“Well, this room’s about 8'x10'x15', so that’s ...8 x 150... 1200cf. I figure ball-pit balls are maybe 4" diameter. …

A lot of people are pooh-poohing these questions and assuming they’re nonsense questions from an HR person.

Behavioral interviewing has become all the rage in hiring and I think this article gets to the point. I interview and hire people and all I want is for candidates to tell me a story from their past that informs me on how they handle coworkers, fuck-ups and stressful situations.

I gave up on Essie polishes. The colors look great in the bottle but it needs too many coats. I cannot sit still long enough for Essie to dry.

I’m having a hard time figuring out the point of doing a beauty blog like this without a decent camera and good and consistent lighting. The difference between makeup products is often really subtle, so a bunch of grainy, low-light, webcam-looking videos of those products is really pretty fucking useless for…