Fun fact: Gwyneth Paltrow actually did die while making Contagion. However, prior to filming, she contracted a genetics lab to make a clone of herself to carry out her Goop legacy.

Tomato soup with a side of grilled cheese sandwich

I know what to tell those people: you are garbage humans. Join the rest of us in the 21st century.

This is my dog she is a good dog

My daughter said she wanted to be a princess. I said why not a queen?

i’m gonna be that guy...it’s Uhura.

If I lived somewhere with open carry, I’d never go out on Halloween.

Nothing good can come from a man named Erick Erickson.

Cats and dogs can see this shit. I trust their instincts.

When I was young our house was broken into and I noticed the intruder hiding under my moms bed by looking in a floor length mirror she had. Guess who’s not a fan of using a bed frame?

Hitler literally wrote a book outlining what he planned to do once he got into power and a lot of people just didn’t take him seriously, so the lesson from that is to take politicians who say horrible things at their word and not dismiss seemingly outrageous calls to deport an entire religion or commit war crimes…

an actor and also a wifebeater

It’s Tiffany. She has to eat under the table.

Why does it look like there is a hand coming out from under the table and is holding onto Barron’s bum?

It probably takes less time than it does for you to write comments like that..

I think everyone kind of wishes, deep down, that Obama was their dad.

Who the fuck is buying 70k trucks?! I would love to see the average loan term on one of these....has to be close to 7 years, with a massive percentage of buyers defaulting. I can’t even look at the price of an F150 without gagging. Yeah, I’m told they’ve got great profit margins, but it seems like these guys are going…

read the article about the abuse and how she tried to get away. also, read every domestic abuse violence experience. ever.

Like I told my friend earlier when he sent this article to me, you know how to fix that mess you made? Invite a friend over for a sleepover and see how embarrassed your kid is to want to have her sleepover in her parents’ room. That will end that shit REAL fast.

Plus who’s going to speak up for a mime when they don’t speak up for anyone else?