jellybeancarney
JellybeanCarney
jellybeancarney

Well, I know what I am reading tonight.

This Twiddles bullshit is all to take the heat off Taylor’s boob job.

you had contractual relationships too?

Haha! I remember watching my 4 yr. old niece staring at an empty cone after the scoop and fallen to the ground. I smiled at her mother and said "Your daughter just discovered gravity. Might want to watch those "pie in the sky" fairytales you've been telling her about life."

Recently, a woman and her 4-year old were shot and killed at 10pm walking to a store (don’t ask) at night by a random stranger in my city. People “can’t believe the tragedy.” I can’t believe they don’t have the dad in custody and are checking all his bank accounts/phone records to proved he ordered a hit. Random

I forgot to get ice cream and cones on the way home tonight for my pregnant wife. The petition to replace me has one signature so far.

There was something I read recently that I don’t have in front of me right now where law enforcement spoke to a group of abusers who explained they absolutely have a system to go from “oh, so loving” into the cycle of violence. It’s planned a lot of the time, with dudes being able to spot someone who will be

I’m naming my first born Gazpaucho.

Sounds dumb, but I always sing “Tomorrow” from Annie after I have my cry or yell or drink. I may have seen that a hundred times when I was 9.

I really blew an audition once when we were supposed to be doing funny improv’ed banter and I was asked what movies would be terrible musicals.

“Leave it to France to find a way to make a dumb sport dumber.” is my new favorite quote of all time.

When they say that she “declined” the paperwork what they mean to say is a mom with three kids can't stand at the courthouse for 12 hours to wait for a judge to give her the paperwork.

I have no credentials to support this opinion, but in high school I was in what I sometimes call a “borderline abusive relationship.” In hindsight, there were definitely red flags. He fell in love with me within days, which made me very uncomfortable. I was 16 and had no idea what was going on, but the word he was

Why is it so fucking common that the guy has some hurdle in his life and he kills the people he should be loving and protecting? It wouldn't ever occur to me to kill my family because I lost a job, or money is tight, or my husband left, or a thousand other crappy week items.

Lost his job, lost his wife, and she’s taking the kids....yeah, he’s going to destroy them all, including the family dog.

Anyone with just passing knowledge of domestic violence would have known it was the father who killed the family and then himself. I knew when it was reported that the dog was also killed. These kinds of murders are about dominance and control.

Disgusting motherfucker. Couldn’t handle the thought of his family moving on after he killed himself so he took them first. Those poor little babies never got a chance.

This is awkward. My birthday is next Saturday and I’m hosting a potluck dinner.