He hasn’t discovered a Starbucks hack, Pinkham, he’s discovered the SECRET BIRTHDAY MENU!

We’re coming home along the Thruway and decide to stop at McD’s. There’s a woman and smallish kid in front of us getting huffy and I can tell this won’t end well. And in due time she starts yelling at the cashier, “Why is everything more expensive here? This is ridiculous! You’re ripping people off!” and so on, as the…

Ah service jobs (food/retail/anything). Where pretty much everyone has at least one story that ends with “and then I went and cried in the bathroom.”

No shit, my story would end with "There were no survivors of what came to be called "The Pizza Cutter Massacre."

This entitled housewife looks back at her impressionable child and calmly says “She is yelling because that girl deserves it, the service is terrible every time we come here.” And then she looked me straight in the eyes.

Having been born in 1979 myself, I can assure you that I did. Pretty much anybody my age saw Escape from Witch Mountain countless times on TV, and Assault in Precinct 13 is a movie with a pretty active cult following to this day. “Did you know that the little girl from Halloween and the little girl from Assault on…

Remember when she was “Kim Richards from ‘Escape from Witch Mountain’ and ‘Assault on Precinct 13’”?

It puts the flavor in the ice cream or it gets the monogrammed thermos again!

I shoot rape face, and pistol whip his idiot friend to death.

Every time I see his Christian-Sharia loving fat face I just think...

There’s never enough mayo on a sandwich. tr00fax

Buffalo style is whathappens when white people discover hot sauce.

eating a salad as a full meal is like eating whispers

Lots of women are just more forgiving than men when it comes to looks.

Well that might be the most disturbing thing I’ve read in quite some time.

Well, sure they’re not individually eligible for your list but I will forever find reasons to plug The Bletchley Circle for anyone who likes detective fare.

shut up. i assume you’re perfect.

A part of me imagines Sally Kimball developing a little Veronica Mars attitude when she and Encyclopedia made it to high school. Only snarkier.

I didn’t know a third season had already aired. Now I have to wait for it to hit Netflix.

Great list. Needs more of the Honorable Phryne Fisher, though (first two seasons currently on U.S. Netflix).