Tom Hanks demands that every cast he works with be fully proficient in firearms, as well as complete basic infantry training and astronaut training. And that was for A League Of Their Own.

It’s not quite an open secret that Tom Hanks has the nasty habit of torturing hobos to death in his basement. He then saves the bodies to use as bait when orca fishing off the back of Spielberg’s yacht.

I still want to know why a guy alone on the moon needs a ping pong table?

But how else am I supposed to bring my entire identity as a person with me when I travel!?

Well, I suppose they’d have to hold a special election.

“I was pissed...I marched over...I shot back”.

Listen son, they gotta slide quota here :)

As an optimist, I have to point out that it could have been worse. It could’ve been a slideshow.

At this point, Dwayne Johnson would take credit for penicillin if someone brought it up.

Stubbing your toe sucks.

Any reason why not? It weights over 1,000 lbs less than the Merc, has around 70 hp more, and Adrian fucking Newey did the aero. I’d honestly be shocked if the Aston is slower.

By this logic, a Miata that somebody stuffed an LS into is a modified Corvette.

Stop giving this guy air.

Would he even be Elon then?

Can someone tell Harrison Ford that?

Amusingly Cleese pointed out at the same time that Monty Python wouldn’t get commissioned by the BBC today because it was “Six white men, 5 of whom went to Oxbridge”, without thinking about why they did get commissioned in 1969.

You will never know until you try?

In much the same way as falling into a cess pit without breaking any bones is better than doing the same with a busted ankle.

If a baker can refuse to put a rainbow on a cake because of who is buying it a theater owner could charge a pregnant woman at least twice. Imagine if octomom showed up?

Ash from Pokemon it is!