You just know there is going to be some awful 10 minute long music montage in the season finale, which will just reinforce everything in this article.

Enjoy watching him airmail the cutoff man on every throw!

Nickleback is the new Creed. I used to not hate them but now if they come on, I can't get that shit off my radio fast enough.

Maybe if Brady wore a headset and communicated with his other coaches, instead of just standing there clapping and patting guys on the ass, he'd be aware of these things.

He looks like Fet from The Strain if Fet had a mohawk.

They're great!..unlike the teams on the field.

Was the theme "Canadian Tuxedo?"

I have a friend who wiped his ass with Clorox wipes one time because he was out of wet wipes. Apparently because they are both "wipes" he assumed they were interchangeable. He said that it burned and I was like duh, you basically just bleached your ass. Anyways, unlike the old man emailer, I'd advise against using…

Sepp Blatter approves of this corruption.

So they moved the turf from Candlestick to the new place?

I hate Joe Nathan. We've had terrible closers before, but at least they weren't ass holes like Sloppy Joe. He seems to be delusion about the fact that he has sucked ass this season.

"Taint Brush" sounds like a personal grooming tool from a TV infomercial.

Carl Hagelin is from Sweden so we'll have to make him a citizen first.