I’m pretty sure 99.999999 percent of people only pay attention to the dates on raw meat and dairy, which they very much should.

My main goal is to get people to forego human meat for one month a year. Just a month! I personally have failed the challenge.

The technically correct past-tense of grill is “grillt”

Get that smut out of here

The pnw heat wave incinerated my cucumbers and tomatoes. The cucumber leaves literally turned into ash when I touched them. And the cucumbers themselves turned into limp, desiccated scrotums.

lol, no

And it was a Japanese dude who developed the wonderful seedless watermelon. It’s a multinational treat!

A pizza place in the middle of nowhere, NV once gave me a pound of canadian bacon because my golden, who was a pup at the time, looked super cute and ... hungry? I guess?

Saltwater taffy tastes like chintzy little shit-hole beach towns crammed full of drunk adults and screaming children on sweltering, sticky, sunburned afternoons.

Sometimes I make a pb&j on meat toast, so I get it.

Actually it’s kind of awkward, but it’s going to take place in night city, circa 2077.

Bastard should have died 87 years ago.

No, no. Let’s leave buffets in the before-times.

Wowzers. He is a truly rancid pile of shit.

Wait, so the software can’t change the physical color of the controller? Fuckin pass.

It’s gonna be Gordon Freeman.

I could see a movie or series focused on and Krogan and Hanar detective team who investigate the Citadel’s most vile and depraved sex crimes.

I’m sorry, but this burger joint needs an editor. It should be called Within-And-Without Hamburger.

Everything in my kitchen is precisely what it claims to be.

Right out of the box, it is capable of multi-track drifting.