I’m from [REDACTED] so we naturally have all these treats; but maybe we had different names for them? In my youth, when the Ice-cream Man used to come by, it always had our favorites ready in its hand-like things as we (the youths) approached. Do you guys remember these ones?

oh my fucking god

So NPCs will scream “fetcher!” at random intervals, volumes and locations? And I’ll often bump into objects that will get stuck on terrain, vibrate at an exponential rate and then launch at escape velocity ... oh my god. Is that how they launch spaceships in this universe?

I once drank a huge amount of hydrogen peroxide and then vomited blood for days. Just goes to show that my stomach was full of infected blood and the peroxide flushed it out.

They look like the world’s worst action figure collection.

Vinegar is probably one of humanity’s greatest inventions/discoveries of all time.

Youngsters may not know this, but back in the day, most people’s only mode of transportation was a typewriter, and in the winter months, you had to sleep with the ”motive ribbon” to keep it warm so it would start in the morning. The upside is that typewriter gas, which contained real cocaine back then, only cost 12…

I’m gonna type a big ol’ lol here. Lol.

I refuse to eat from any joint that isn’t carbon negative. By which I mean the complete antimatter annihilation of all carbon used in the manufacture and cooking process. 

Another handy tip is, if you have a cicada allergy, you shouldn’t spend 17 years of your life buried in the earth.

I would rather kill all my fiends and relatives, and myself, than eat food from Chili’s.

Miguel Alcubierre’s House of Manifolds

lol, humans were never proud or noble.

BRING BACK THE BEST RESTAURANT SERIES

Japanese rhinoceros beetles, which are popular for kids to catch, are fucking enormous. Also plenty of other big ol crickets and beetles.

Top Snacks; A Definitive List:

How will the Twoops ever recover from this slight? Poor guys.

lol no

Yup. Chickens are vile beasts.