Fuck, calling Discovery channel to have everyone fired.

I've used a similar with good success— "I am not very good at navigating office politics. I am a very direct person— if there is a problem, I talk about it. I say what I mean. I used to expect others to do the same, so was completely oblivious to office politics happening around me. Inevitably I'd end up stepping…

What my greatest weakness?

If I'm eating out I'm definitely not asking the waiter/waitress for a "bin end list" of wine. That's just self deprecating. If you're eating at a nice enough place for wine buy the nice stuff.

I know this sounds not-jalop enough or whatever, but this is why I buy new cars. They're all new and shiny and have warranties and I pay for depreciation rather than repairs. Just a personal choice really. Paying for a repair always made me think, "I'd rather just have a car payment instead of this".

Jesus. Gotta wonder, though, why the hell was the guy recording in the first place?

I remember seeing my cat's penis for the first time and thinking he had a worm crawling out of his ass. As I got closer to pull it out my wife warned me that was in fact his dick and she basically saved my life. Eternally grateful.

Dishwasher Cleaner

Bro

I've found that fidgeting with something helps. Whenever I start to feel anxious, I find something to put in my hands and fool around with to help distract me/physically work out my anxiety. It also helps to keep me grounded when I feel like I'm slipping into dissociation.

I know exactly what happened. He hit the gas instead of the brake, therefore he can blame this on a floor mat made by Toyota and GM will then issue a recall for it.

I had to read a couple hundred words to find out this guy was speechless.

I really wish the government would get out of sports by not forcing the Redskins to change their name, but also stay involved in sports by keeping gay people out.

By "looks like an Explorer", you mean "it IS an Explorer, full stop", right? Because it is. Might just be a misleading mule body over something else, but that there's an Explorer.

so, you would rather walk than just take the crap off your keychain?

I can't believe how many civilians had to die in order for these guys to bring down one criminal!? LOL

Being an NPC in that universe is the worst.

"I'd buy that for ten dollars!"

It's an anti-motion trembler device. It's custom-made.