This was good, but the downside is that I’m going to spend the next eight hours power-ranking the Gasol brothers.

I hope you mean the Point Break remake.  Because he is 0% Swayze, or we’d be seeing a lot more roundhouses.  

Joust was definitely the one I wanted to do the most. That one or the one where you run around and take cover while some steroid guy with a perm shoots tennis balls at you.

My ranking of the AG events I remember:

Tough break for the Man Boys.

Also very familiar with your wife.

I know how this is gonna go. The Browns are going to jump in and offer their first round picks to help out the Celtics.

A-HA!

As a Blazers fan, I think these are brilliant hires. and also here's a pre-emptive fuuuuuuuuuuuck you.

Another US loss in Vietnam. You hate to see it.

Maybe they will meet-cute, fall in love and have a baby:  Jizz Thrower.

Judgment day. Something pope is not afraid of 

Drew Sharp is rolling over in his grave that he doesn’t get to write like seven trolling columns on this subject.

But at least it’s a franchise with better prospects than Detroit.

Please use the “Jennifer” meme after all future headlines. My name is Jennifer and this article has that personal touch that most articles are missing and I really appreciate it. Thx.

I am fucking stanning the blazers and I will fight you tech bros wherever you are if you can find me I don’t know where I am hell yes let’s do some basketball 

I don't agree (I really want to believe but can't) but appreciate your optimism

Wait. What? Who?

Well actually, you are trying to use logic on a Billy Haisley “article”. That is where you have erred. 

Glad to see their game against Brighton and Hove Albion went according to plan but really it’s was just what they’ve been able to do all year. They were deadly against Frimsby FC, solid against Quival Town, had that stellar comeback against Vinswich Passage, blanked Buscestershire (both at home and at Wriggleby Road)…