Are you going to do one of these for pets?

Maybe it’s time to reevaluate whether or not you want him as a fiance? It’s drastic, I know, but it sounds like he’s fallen down the QAnon hole (with the Biden is a pedophile thing) and I’m not sure that’s the kind of person you would want in your life. This isn’t something that I’m saying to you lightly, but I follow…

Two cans of beans for breakfast? That’s going to be a lot of methane, and too much fiber, 21 grams of fiber for one can of black beans. 42 grams of fiber, at once? That’s trouble.

I did a reverse Becky/Karen today! O yes I did!

So being a female Christian influencer means being made up like a beauty contestant and sexualizing yourself performing mundane tasks like eating donuts, laughing, and sitting in a car?

Man. You’ve been out of the loop. I have so bad news about a virus going around. 

Influenzers amirite

How ridiculous. Everyone knows Ted Cruz’s father has the blood-stained JFK outfit.

Come on, it was a Grease thing.
The movie is like, 37.5% about hair.
Plus it hurts to switchblade comb bald skin ^^

First of all, those are apes.

Good for Kumail! He clearly busted his ass and he’s being honest about the resources it took to look like that. Nothing wrong with him feeling good about it and showing it off. That said, I hope his new abs and Marvel success don’t wreck his marriage in the tradition of Chris Pratt.

I still don’t know who Bret Stephens is, but: CANCELED

IDK...if I looked as bangin’ in that dress as does, I’d be wearing it to the Target.  

I think I have more awareness than anyone really needs to have of famous people and I have never heard those names ever

“Jason Derulo!” - Jason Derulo

I was with you right up until both of you did the cat thing in the middle of the dance floor.  I don’t think those were hungry eyes...

Under the religious logic, viable doesn’t mean what you think it means. They operate basically on the dichotomy of dead fetus or not dead fetus. Because miracles. So they will wait up until the very last possible moment, until the mother’s life is in imminent danger, before they act. That’s the only way they can…

Man, black cats are the best. I appreciate any opportunity to share my beautiful little gremlin with the world. Heres Dahlia...she doesn’t much care for football but would make a killer table tennis player.

As a Gawker refugee who decamped to Deadspin despite only a passing interest in sports, this content speaks to me. Thank you. 

I’m crying from laughter. This is excellent.