This is an obligatory post, since I’m an infrequent Jalopnik contributor, and I’m not a full time writer: G/O Media is killing Jalopnik.

Car dealers exist because people don’t want to deal with other people.  People don’t want to negotiate, they don’t want to wait for people to show up, to get lowballed and deal with scammers.  People like you are fine with dealing with all of that, but most people are not.

Your problem was that you didn’t buy a bigger boat after selling your boat.

And you would have driven crappy used cars all your life. You can’t take it with you.

But did you have a Yeti 110 and some silver bullets?

You should have boat another boat!

I’m certainly not complaining about the charmed life I lead, but damn that Pathfinder-for-Sierra swap was dumb. The upside is that I quickly traded in the Sierra on my beloved Honda Element. Then I drove the Element for 5 years, which is an eternity for me.

First world issues but I feel your pain on that one.

Ugh, don’t remind me. I would hate to count the many thousands of dollars I’ve pissed away over the years by jumping between cars. Luckily I haven’t had to finance any of them in a while, but still. The one I most regret is my 2nd gen Pathfinder that I traded in on a GMC Sierra because the Pathy couldn’t tow my boat.…

Esther, what are you sitting here slandering Hershey’s chocolate as the worst Halloween candy when Charleston Chew, Good & Plenty, Bit-o-Honey and Necco Wafers are floating around? Not to say anything of raisins!

If Hersheys is the worst you can conjure, you grew up in some high end trick or treating territory.

You NEVER go *full* retro.

And by “year” I assume you mean the entire year.

Covered wagons. They’ll be going full retro. 

Let’s see... horsey names:

Today is Thursday.  Yesterday was business time.

I don’t think your dad brought that back from Japan. I think you stole it from Ricky Falcone on Christmas morning. 

Ahh, but we already had one of those. It was called the Omnibot 2000 and my dad brought it home from Japan back in the 1980s. It could bring you as beer, pour drinks, and do all kinds of stuff, like act as a mobile megaphone and scare the hell out of your dog. It was programmable, too.

They did just recently release a live album with some new hits and some old goodies.