But will the fuel economy be good enough that I can get to the nearest Ram dealer on a single tank? I’d rather not have to fill up on my way to trade it in. 

If someone makes a Beefsquatch, count me in. Maybe it’s a Ram with a Hellcat engine? 

Yes, like in Star Wars.

There’s already a car for sloths. It’s called the Dodge Journey. 

Used CRV/Rav4 or new Kia Soul. 

Yeah, that’s fine. As long as they don’t ever make the new micro bus, all is right with the world.

When we were in high school, my brother had one of those late 60's Power Wagons with the 4-speed and granny gear. He took it to the lake one day with his friends and didn’t set the parking brake. It sat at the bottom of the lake for a full day until they finally pulled it out and towed it home. It actually started up…

Sweet truck, sour price. 

I’m sure they could figure something out. Maybe he could wear a Roger Moore mask. 

Yeah, Idris Elba would have been great 10 years ago. But he might still be good. Just an older Bond. 

Who do we like to be the next Bond? I hope it’s Tom Hardy. 

I did a survey in my household. Daughter has a Kia, wife has a Hyundai, I have a Ram. FCA finished in the top three. Expect a press release from them any minute now. 

How’s the gas mileage? Decent? 

Yeah, the old pointy nose one. I identify it as early 2000's because that’s when I used to see them all over San Diego. But most were probably late 90's models. 

One of my neighbors had a cherry, early 2000's 7 series parked in front of their house this weekend. Maybe it was late 90's, not sure. I’m not normally a “things were better back when...” kind of guy, but sweet greasy jesus, that was a beautiful car. I don’t think I’ve had more than a passing interest in any BMW in…

That really took a left turn for the worse.

Craziness. What’s next, a modern transmission in the 4Runner?

Smokey and the Bandit 4 really took the franchise in a new, darker direction. 

Typical selfish American. Think of all the people that need those watermelons, Mountain Dew, dog toys, and jean jackets. You want them to slow down just so you can pull over and take the Browns to the Superbowl?

My dad was a truck driver for a few years in the late 80's when I was a kid. I rode shotgun on many trips with him. To this day, he is my hero and the greatest man I’ve ever known. And I wouldn’t trust him to lead a convoy of trucks.