Probably after Harry. The rest aren't as cute. I mean, Liam is nice, but no. And Zayn is a silly spelling. hahaha! Seriously, just kidding. Sorry. Tired. Don't mind me.

Knock knock.

And we need to destigmatize abortion post-haste. We need to reclaim the semantic debate so that we pro-choicers don't ever concede ground by calling the other side "pro-life" (because, hahahaha!). We need more women who had one without any sense of conflict (as I am doing here, now) standing up and saying, I had one,…

Awwe, c'mon, those ANTM girls were just being bitches! Fabio seems like an A-OK dude to me!

This seems late to me.

I mean, Greek men turn into their fathers in their mid-twenties—-soon after they kill someone in a fight and then marry the Queen of Thebes.

I'm sorry a can opener bris'd you.

DO NOT TRY THAT.

I refuse to support Big Lentil.

Millennials:

You need to realize that your generation is not going to get anything. Yes, maybe you grew up with some nice things that you enjoyed; a house your parents could afford, a decent car, decent health care... But should you want these things for yourselves? No. No other generation cared about these material…

So they were trying to holler at her while hanging out the side of their best friend's ride? I wish there was a word for people like that.