I went totes gentle into that good night.

That made my multitudes hurt.

Marry me.

It took me a minute figure out what the hell that meant, too, but then I realized it was an extremely pithy summary of Emmerich's Godzilla. Pithy and apt.

Thanks. I now want to see this film even less than I did before I read your synopsis. You have saved me $13. Okay, maybe not $13, but you saved me whatever bandwidth it would have taken to download a badly-shot cam version to find that out. Oh - and time. You saved me time.

When I read the headline I mistook "Benjamin Gates" for "Henry Louis Gates" (for some reason) and couldn't figure out what the fuck he had to do with any of this nonsense. But after watching the trailer, I'm longing for Tom Hanks to go full Henry Louis Gates.

Wait - what?

Yes. If that scene was in the trailer for Thespians then I might've bought it.

Please don't tell me that Dangerous Minds isn't what's happening in your classroom, because I'll lose all faith in public education.

Those are going to be the most ripped roadies ever.

Are you "a bit of a loner"? I want to know what to tell the press when you're finally arrested.

Yeah - "Michael Sheen's character murders a woman…with sexy results."

That's probably for the best.

I totally agree - I just can't believe we're still having this argument 107 years later.

I would like to volunteer as lead plaintiff in that class action lawsuit.

Bare minimum, I know there are still some vacant Dominick's they could use.

Or Mustang Ranch.

He's definitely the Loki of the Hemsworth family. I'd describe him to you, except he is completely devoid of memorable features, physical or otherwise.

Well, his wife's from Chicago, so she's really the one that pulled the plug on the Presidio.

Hell, Friends of the Parks is still angry about Lake Point Tower in 1968.