Wow, make champagne popsicles is the new let them eat cake. I never got that memo. Nice.

For fuck’s sake, Gwyneth Paltrow would have more class and self-awareness in the White House.

Remember when Donald was going to make us respected by the whole world? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Yeah, Cosby, because the thought of someone making you ingest something against your will and knowledge is pretty fucking horrifying, huh?

Paying for a defense lawyer doesn’t mean you’re on board with what a person does. As reprehensible as the charges are, everyone deserves the best defense team possible. That even includes rapists and pedophiles.

For Christ’s sake, it’s been long enough to be done with this bullshit. She did NOT “willfully endanger lives.” She revealed crimes. Any retaliation for those crimes is on the people who committed them and those who covered them up. She’s a whistleblower. Not a traitor. We should be pinning medals on her.

It makes me sad that Sofia Coppola told her to lose weight. Like give me a fucking break she has always been slender.

If she treats the housekeeper well and compensates her for the modeling, then cool. Otherwise take a long walk off a short plank, you human version of My Little Pony.

Why? You already have that covered.

Eh, I didn’t hate it. Good for Miley. We all go through a regrettable gross stage.

The comments aren’t Jezebel.

SHE DIDN’T SAY SHE WAS THE FIRST. THAT IS WHY THIS BLOG POST WAS WRITTEN.

Dear Universe, were I bequeathed of such a fortune as the Hiltons possess, I promise I will make better use of it. I will do a little happy dance simply for being able to pay all of my bills, each month. I will give much of it away. I will sip coffee in bed feeling peace, gratitude, and thankfulness. I will tend my…

A girl who was seemingly conceived, incubated, hatched, trained, conditioned and indoctrinated to be an object of sexual desire as the sole purpose of her existence and her only contribution to society is saying that she doesn’t get to be objectified enough? Do I have the right read on this one?

Yeah, but they can all just slip right out.

The second paragraph states that they abandoned the BMI as a way of controlling model size. Models do have to have a doctor’s note, but they are not judged on their BMI.

On the plus side, they’ll be able to fit all the banned models in a single jail cell.

Looks like someone didn’t read the article.

Did you read the article? They aren’t using BMI.

Can you have a series dedicated to a daily Fyre Fest update? This is never not funny.