If he had ended up on teh cowboys and Emmitt was on the lions Barry would have had 25k yards rushing and emmitt would have been a night manager at a bowling alley after 3 years in the league.

Congrats on joining us here at what I like to call, the punchline

Why the fuck are you defending this? Good God the brain dead asshole apologists for morons like this “influencer” are why they have no decency.

You don’t think there’s anything wrong with someone filming with a camera in a bathroom where others are using the toilet, including children?

Finally, a video that belongs on Deadspin.

There is no way a person who wasn’t a fan of wrestling knew who Sheamus was. I refuse to believe that.

So that guy dedicated a year of his life forming a fake friendship in order to get back at the guy who . . . spoiled a movie?

See, I don’t understand any of this at all. I book a hotel room so I have somewhere to sleep when I’m not doing what I’m in town to do. The job of housekeeping is to refresh the room after I’ve used it. I’m not gonna trash the room, but why should I do their job for them? If I want privacy, I need to feel bad about…

I feel bad for Zion’s knee. But this is tremendous content.

Shut the fuck up.

I’d say this pretty much sums up her social life. Add a dozen cats and you’ll have her future.

Really good college sports fans can be a fucking delight—you have to be some combination of funny, smart or original.  She’s just a nuisance that’s none of those things.

I haven’t paid for a pen in decades. I’m a (retired) physician and every pharmaceutical rep always had pens. I had so many pens that when one of my hospitals decided they were going to make nurses bring their own pens to work I opened up a desk drawer and donated over 100 pens to them without making a dent in my…

There is no way DFW should be at the bottom. It has the fastest security lines for a major airport that I have ever been in because there are so many places you can go through security at each terminal. Typically you hardly have to walk but a few gates past security to reach yours. The only annoying thing about it is…

Kickoff returns are the worst kick return.

Does anyone look good coming out of this story?

I’m not sure what this is supposed to mean but you can get fucked, too.

I figured that Lawrence Phillips would be a better RB to upset a St. Louis fan.

I too am an athletic white man, and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

The one the dealer puts on when you buy your new car/truck.