Jake Gyllenhaal of Fame
Feb 24 2020

In early 2018, my local mom and pop grocer had a sign in front of the peaches section that said “As seen in Call Me By Your Name!”

Feb 20 2020

Mona Lisa, I got to know
Where the fuck are your eyebrows, I really wanna know
You could land a helicopter on that big potato forehead
Get this chick some Rogaine
You a bloated corpse, girl

Feb 14 2020

Aurora Borealis!? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized entirely within your livestream?

Feb 11 2020

The last time I visited a Subway restaurant was March 13, 2013. How do I remember that date? It just happened to be the day the Vatican announced Francis as the new pope. 

Feb 11 2020

Using his speech as his own little platform aside, can we talk about how his performance in Joker was udderly sublime?