No, you’re thinking of Poochie the dog on his way bag to his home planet.

If you don’t know what it is, then you can’t afford it.

Fun fact: during the bridge in Foo Fighter’s song Everlong, you can hear inaudible whispering. It’s actually just a few layers of Dave Grohl reading stereo instructions aloud.

If you ask me, The Onion is fake news.

Drain the swamp!

Oh my god that is too funny while being dangerously too close to the truth. You should write for Weekend Update.

“I Like Food” by The Descendants is only like 9 seconds long.

Heeeeeere’s Johnny Cakes!

Hey, remember MySpace?!?!?!?!

Do we really want to give legitimacy to a murderous pirate?

We all should have seen this coming considering his tendency to spank mischievous ten year olds living across the street from him.

I’ll occasionally order something online late at night drunk and completely forget it until I get it in the mail several days later.

I worked a couple days a week my senior year of college in the school’s library and got to know some of the full time staff. This description is 100% on point.

The Beatles are a poor man’s Monkees

I saw this somewhere recently but someone posited that if the concept of libraries were only recently created in today’s world, they’d be branded “socialist indoctrination centers”

Lets not forget one of his classic non-apologies... “Sorry if you didn’t find me vomiting in your lap funny, Mr. Prime Minister of Japan.”

Ohhh, a Gary Larson cartoon.

They don’t call me Springfield Fats just because I’m morbidly obese.

Wow, I thought you were making that up until I went back to the front page and saw the ad.

I showed my kids Clerks to introduce them to black-and-white films