Just did some quick math.

I thought I saw this crossing the border into Ukraine, too.

Can I sue BMW because I'm able to punch myself in the face whilst driving my 3 series? Seriously you'd have to do that on purpose to turn the ignition off. Now I'm off to see if I can kick myself in the balls in my Audi TT. I look forward to suing Audi if I can

That bet is typical despicable de Blasio strategy, pitting the Habs against the Habs-nots.

Somewhere in Audi's New Jersey headquarters is a 31-year-old manager-level guy in Warby Parker glasses and skinny pants whose job it is to pick up the phone when a panicked dealer calls and give advice on how to find a local DJ with "the cool factor." This is simultaneously one of the best, and worst, jobs one could…

I was JUST thinking: "How great would that be to open in front of a bar?!"

It appears this guy is butt hurt.

I'm a fat girl, and I can't wait to start at the gym this weekend. Not only because I really need to get healthy, but because I delight at the idea of revolting people with my presence, who look at me as if I sully the place with my out of shape self.

After all, the gym is only for fit people....right?

This is perhaps neither here nor there, but I'll take any opportunity I can to opine on how much capital-R runners irritate me. I run in a couple 5K races or maybe a half-marathon each year, and I'm always supremely annoyed by these people. Just a weird, awful combination of preppie/yuppie/bougie/frattiness…

I started unfucking myself a few months ago, and happily look forward to having other people in the gym who look as bad or worse than me, and are just as clueless about the equipment as I am. Oh, and being able to flex my microscopic pectorals for the first time is god damn amazing. Welcome, resolosers!

I can't believe how dangerous that is. How is he going to reach the fire extinguisher quickly with that bear in the way?

Hey, maybe if she didn't wanna get hit, she should have been born a man and then hit this guy even harder with her stronger, faster arms.

Porche Macan S: Starts at $52,000, nicely optioned, $102,000