Fun fact: as a father, I envy the dead.

Asking me to choose which stadium scam I dislike most is like asking me to choose which of my children I dislike the most, by which I mean I hate them all equally because they make my life a living hell.

When I was in middle school and got the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue my parents thought I was the reincarnation of Fred Merkle.

I think Bernie being a Jew would have fired up an even larger base of deplorables.

Aww fuck, who got Ann Coulter wet?

Enough with the glorification of this night. I had to grow up hearing dozens of doughy South Side Irish mooks claiming they were there like it was the fall of Saigon.

Why is everybody in such a fuhrer over this?

Just so I’m clear, your stance is to murder people who hit other people? The fuck?