Texting someone out of the blue to tell them you’re masturbating with a cucumber is highly inappropriate. That person has boundaries, Jan.

Feel better? 

Possibly the greatest debut album by any artist, ever.

My camping doughnut recipe is a little different.

Off the top of my head: Mr. Phipps Pretzel Chips, the old Wendy’s fries, and the old Kraft Mac & Cheese formula (before it had to be microwavable).

All pizzas have their wonderful quirks, those features that shine through and make life special. For some, it’s a crust; for others, it’s a cheese; some have a peculiar sauce, or special toppings. All pizzas have something to contribute to the culinary world.

It’s obviously battered fish.

Always a tip. The money kind. 

They wanted a switch and that’s what they got. I don’t see the problem.

Well said. I’ve kind of had a morbid fascination with BRC since I learned about the existence of the company - I like to try different roasters from different areas - but their entire branding seems to be built around the “stick it to duh libuhrals” mindset that runs through a lot of other capital C conservative…

I think it’s more so whining about liberal boogeymen. 

Yeah, no. Unless you leave a note with the reduced tip, they'll just assume that you're cheap. 

“The force is strong in this one”

Pretty sure they were actually seagulls.

Most folks don’t know this, but right before Yoda lifted that X Wing out of the swamp, he smashed a few snakes to death with his walking stick.

Corporate finance

when i was a kiddo, i got a wee cooking set for christmas one year. it contained a tiny whisk, bc everything was tiny, and damned if my mom didn’t totally steal that thing from me and use it as her own in just the ways you described. she still has it to this day and will probably never relinquish it.

As a kid, I preferred sour candies over chocolate. These days, I don’t favor one over the other.

One of my favorite quotes from Julia Child:

this is what happens when you send Amelia Bedelia to steal iPads