It kind of made me feel like that marshmallow stuff was going to come out of my butt and I'd never get it off.

We said "fluff" in our house because fart and crap and stupid were swear words.

When I turned sixteen, my dad said to me, "you can swear all you fucking want to around me now. You're sixteen, so I don't give a fuck if you do. Just don't swear in front of your mother. She hates that shit."

I had a teacher in high school that thought fart was as bad of a word as the various swears. He'd get all mad when we said it! He was a really religious guy and also my physics and chemistry teacher. It's a wonder I got any education at all.

Oh for fuck's sake! I was born and raised in Iowa-where the hell do you think I learned to swear like a sailor? Or went to law school?

I agree. Plus, you can't make little Republican babies that way. Only gay welfare babies.

I genuinely believe that Mike Huckabee is too much of a square for blowjobs.

Also blowjobs. How else are you supposed to keep your man happy?

Hey Fuckabee, I'll stop swearing like a trucker when every woman in this fucking country has access to all the birth control and abortion services they need.

Any action taken whilst in possession of a vag renders said action wrong. Unless said action involves pushing a baby out of said vag.

This man's main concerns recently seem to be Beyonce's sexuality and women swearing. I think his constitution is far too delicate for him to want to throw his hat into the ring to be president of the US. This man need a cup of tea, a blanket, a nap and to never have a position of authority again.

I am just going to replace all my curse words with well timed farts. YOUR MOVE HUCKABEE.

You have to understand in Mike Huckabee's world Ladies' mouths should only be used for sweet pecks on the cheek, tasting their cooking and occasionally singing songs about other ladies who they hope won't steal their man.

"I asked Jesus how much he loved me. And Jesus said "This much." Then he stretched out his arms, handed me a fleshlight, and died."

Hey, it still got you off.... work.

Tbh I just felt like making a dick joke.

Are you cruising for dates?

Uncensored version or it didn't happen.

your model gets points for proposing an actual mechanism. I'll believe it until proven wrong. Here's hoping star trek 13, we're all counting on you