@Dr_Van_Nostrand: Probably the most exciting game I have ever watched.

#iwasthereI know this is just a bit outside the last decade, but it is very appropriate for me today. It was September 13th, 1998. The Cubs had a playoff bound team, but the big story that summer was the Maguire/Sosa home run chase.

Chronic lateness. Check

@formerly Chief Wahoo: +1

@Alfan Golenpaul: We should be so lucky. Oh, I may be alone in this. Sorry, fellas.

Man... 2009 sucks.

Tiger is on suicide watch, right?

Eli's version of the slutwagon is him dressed as Pa Engels driving a horse and carriage.

I would like a bottle of Patron for each day of Hannukah. Thanks.

@Lets_Go_Strangers: Worse yet, is a text that she slept with Tiger Woods. Becasue not only are you sleeping with him, but everyone he has slept with, and everyone they have slept with, and on and on.

Don't worry Pittsburgh fans, I looked at my nephew last night and said the only prayer Chicago has for a winning team in the next 5 years are the Blackhawks. And then only 10 percent of the city will care.

@Proverbial: My own tits are real and fabulous, I am here for the dick jokes and WHORES.

@cromartie: I'm a rightie, so I am not worried.

Now I have to go to NYC to try and sleep with Granderson. It was much more convenient when he was just 4 hours away.

@Juancho: Absoltely a spectacle. That is the horror of it all. Have some dignity people. Just a smidge of class goes a long way.

If she only had a buzzsaw tattoo then we would know it was kismet.

I just want to punch him in his smarmy face everytime I see a picture of him. And I have never hit anyone in my life. Fuck this guy.

Was your date with a stripper similar to this, AJ?

@DennyCrane: I think it is a Stoops family and employment tree with out the picture. But I can't be sure because I stopped reading somewhere in the second paragraph.

Did the season end already? Or are they using the DeLorean to write this thing?