Thank you. I am well aware I could bogart this entire thread complaining because I am currently cervix deep in the nasty and I feel poisoned by it. I had taken a break from work just before this all happened so I’m probably too preoccupied by it, but also wonder how the hell I would be functioning with ACTUAL…

I ughed my way through the whole profile. Part of me wanted to flag it and have it removed but it didn’t violate standards beyond the ugh factor so I had to grit my teeth and push it through. He will falter. He will fail. He will blame everyone else for this.

St. Patrick’s day in Chicago is fucking mayhem. I treated it like the Purge and just fucking tried to stay safe til it ended

They’re good enough (barely) to fight and die for their country. But to actually live in it and express themselves openly? Fuck no.

I’ll offer myself up to our new insect overlords and just be done with it.

Zero tolerance for shamefully bright colors!

Nothing worse than when you run across a dude wearing a paracord bracelet. It is like the office worker with a leatherman on their belt. It will never be used and they are always on the lookout for scenarios to use it.

I will say, my “invention” was better than his.

As an archer that fucking bow scares the shit out of me... the tension is coming from bungie! I guess it’s better than nothing but I wouldn’t want to be around when someone lets loose an arrow. So much energy passing through what I’m guessing is cheap PVC pipe.

I’m lazy as fuck so I’d let the aliens/zombies/cannibals take me out.Because it just seems so exhausting to be constantly on the run, fearing for you life.

A recent issue of Popular Mechanics featured one of their occasional ‘Survive Anything!’ guides. The editor tied it to the new American spirit of self-reliance epitomized by the campaign of Donald J. Trump.

Jokes on him! According to Mad Max he’ll just line up the perfect shot then get run over by a dune buggy with a mad bald ozzy screaming out the back waving a shotgun.

Because Trump’s entire schtick revolves around projecting his own flaws onto his opponents, whoever they may be. The most obvious current example is his way of declaring any kind of fact-based journalism to be “fake news.” And have you noticed the way he talks about fat people?

Those aren’t Q-tips, they are eye shadow applicators.

Yep, it’s not what you know, it’s who you know.

Well a swamp provides ecological benefits and has a reason to exist.

Can someone again explain to me what a “swamp” is and why the Trump Cabal in not one?

The scary worker bees at Scientology are called the “Sea Org”.

This might be the worst idea that anyone has ever had in the history of time.

Literally the reason why movie theaters are struggling. Make it less easy to bring kids to the movies and a lot of people will come back.