All the rape-truthers who are gleeful about this keep insisting it’s not an isolated incident, Because Tawana Brawley and also Because Duke Lacrosse. So false rape reports are such an insidious problem they can name one per decade.

I am beginning to get a sneaking suspicion that getting fewer than a million votes in a statewide election may not be an indication you have what it takes to succeed on the national stage.

He can’t desert his constituents.

Has anyone set that clip to “Yakkety Sax”?

This guy is going to do so, so well in a primary debate.

I’m sure they’re glad this is going to replace Martese Johnson in the news cycle. It’s substantially harder to argue that honor students wouldn’t get brutalized if they’d just pull their pants up.

This is what it takes. Think about that. And we’ll still hear any and all dirt they can find on Scott during the trial.

In b4 “Institutional racism isn’t real because he was charged.”

“...for FREEDOM! Why doesn’t the liberal media ever let me finish?”

I expect an extremely competent campaign from a guy who couldn’t even bother to find a flattering photo for his tease.

That’s what I said! Except replace the last line with “So let’s not have kids.”

Mrs. Boourner is ginger and recently found out “Aidy” is Gaelic for “little fire,” so now she kind of wants a daughter she can call that. Curse you, America’s sweetheart Aidy Bryant.

“McCready and Willing.”

SURPRISINGLY COMPLEX BURNS CAN’T MELT STEEL BEAMS, SHEEPLE.

He is an adult human being named “Rand.” He will not win. At the very most he will be the Huckabee or the Santorum, one of the last one or two crazy people who refuse to concede the nomination to the least-crazy candidate, pushing said candidate increasingly farther to the right until he’s spending the general…

You know what this means, right? His supporters have a very important decision to make about whether they get rid of the “No Fat Chicks” or “Work Harder, Millions on Welfare Depend On It” bumper sticker to clear space.

I guess with “Justified” ending the minor villains need to find new jobs.

Crap, I forgot about that. By my own logic the only true good guys are white supremacists. Never mind.

Kelly Clarkson is like that character in a book or a movie where you can tell whether a character is good or bad by whether they’re nice to her.