Add Radio Shack to the list. Yes, they still exist in some places. And they will literally take back any of their products, in any condition, and give you your money back. They will, of course, also offer you a replacement for the item you return; just don’t be surprised to find it too is in poor condition, as most…

I guess; to my tongue, they’re pretty savory already.

I completely adore the last one!

There’s just a tiny box.

I’m taking a grim delight in the prospect of a God whose physical address I can know. That would be one helluva weekend.

Yes.

Agreed. First, he can get out of my country. Then, he can book a seat on one of Branson’s space taxis, put The Club on the wheel and aim it for the Sun.

One of my grandfathers was one. Kinda strict and judgy on matters of doctrine, but when it came to everyday life he was pretty chill; a legitimately decent man.

A small pat of butter, a sprinkle of sugar, you’re done. Maybe a swirl of honey or maple syrup if you’re feeling adventurous.

$150 says Mike Huckabee absolutely loves kiddie porn.

Mike Huckabee supports child molestation. So, we’ve got that over all our idiot right-wing relatives until the Sun burns out.

Yeah... yeah, that’s the one, alright.

Makes me wish there were an emoticon or emoji to express “I’m laughing uproariously at your slightest inconvenience, and relishing your misfortune so deeply it’s actually disgusting me a little.”

we’re trying to have a goddamn society here

Psssht!

It’s not a complete loss; just churn it into rat cheese, or rat butter. Not my thing, but it’s still better for you than Nutella.

Mr. Sheeran has reached 14:30, and eagerly counting down.

1. Next time that happens, you should catch it on video and upload it to YouTube. Clicks = Cash, baby.

We never saw it, because of the blindfolds.

Right?!? How can a man that gay be so devoid of style?