ivelostlikefiveburners
Andi
ivelostlikefiveburners

I want him to go all in 100%. Just talk about how she’s gonna get shlonged again. Say some stuff about her body. Talk about her face being ugly or how your wife has a better ass than she does, or about how there’s no way she can handle being a president when she’s got blood coming out of her whatever. Yeah. More of

Hahaha, there’s so much to love here. Mostly though, I kind of want ‘Your Cuntness’ to be an actual title, and I want it to be mine.

The crinkly ones are good. The puffy ones are bad. The jalapeño ones are good once in a while. The hot ones are evil incarnate.

Okay so there are SOME things that would kill it for me.

What if he wanted to wear a Ted Cruz mask during sex and he insisted you stare at it the whole time?

It'd be a hate fuck for sure, but the man is fine. Now if he endorsed Cruz, he would be off the table.

Do you use a fork for all Cheetos or just hot Cheetos because I too use a fork but only for hot Cheetos! Mostly because I went to see UP in the theatre and was eating hot Cheetos and started bawling my eyes out, wiped them with hot Cheetos fingers and DIIIIIED. Chips sticks is such a great idea.

Fuck no. I fold it in half like a decent human being.

You just gave me an existential crisis because I’m seriously debating whether or not I would and I don’t even know which way I’d go... I have very very strong feelings on both sides of this issue.

Not sure anything could make me not want to sleep with Oscar Isaac.

You monster. Do you eat pizza with a knife and fork.

He could endorse Trump and I'd still hit that.

I almost made a comment “I bet Kylie babysat for him and Blacc” without knowing that it actually happened.

all of the above is so true but do you remember being 18? no one makes great choices at that age :( also, hasn’t he been creepily grooming her since she was like 14 and a babysitter for his kid back when he was still with his ex? just ew gross no thank you on that whole situation.

I get what Tyga gets out of this relationship — he keeps his name out there despite having a non-existent music career and a girlfriend with money to burn. But for Kylie, I just don’t see it.

MAYBE it is just because I am a cynical asshole and also a fat but the joke was that she is fat right?

I honestly don’t get it. Is this an “oops, I’m at the wrong wedding” prank? Are you saying it has something to do with her being fat (which was my first thought)?

Oh lord. The trolls are mutating. Before long they’ll be able to put a coherent sentence together without stopping for frequent jerk-off breaks.

Rob would be one of those victors that just hid in a tree until everyone else killed each other.

Not a Daredevil or Jessica Jones fan, Bobby?