I laughed far too loudly at 'cockbites,' then had to turn it into a violent cough so people think I'm actually working. Thanks for that :)

It's going to be cold as balls on Halloween where I am, and we're going to an outdoor party. I immediately changed my costume from Sexy Poison Ivy to Hipster Poison Ivy so I can dress in layers and not freeze my ass off. I am not committed to the sexy.

I think it's more the hero thing, but I'd have to ask her to be sure. She very much believes that whole "The way to stop bad guys with guns is good guys with guns" thing. She is also an anti-vaxxer. Fortunately, she's being transferred to a different office at the end of the month.

I am not a fan of guns. I can come up with very few situations in which I would feel safer if a gun were involved. People who go out of their way to talk about guns unnerve me. I wouldn't say that I fear for my life, but she did mention that she would be taking her gun to a large downtown event ("In case anything…

I work with a former Marine and she is freaking out about Ebola. She seriously believes there is some sort of government cover up happening. This same person is LITERALLY the reason our company has a gun policy. Our boss thought it was just common sense, don't bring your gun to work. But as a former Marine, this woman…

I love her and her character so much. Watching season 1, I was like, "I need more Poussey!" She only had 10 lines and I needed more. So then Season 2 came and I got a little bit more, but not nearly enough (I will only be satisfied when she is the main character). I told my friend she is hands down my favorite and he…

I used to work at a bakery and my boss would complain about stuff like this. She wasn't super wealthy, but she was solidly middle class. She would bitch about how the kids from the poorer areas of town would come and take her candy, and then she'd look at me like, "Don't you agree?" I did not agree because I was one…

Dr. Facilier's song was awesome, especially the animation. Hands down my favorite song in that movie.

I hate Daniel Day-Lewis. Method actors are the actual worst to work with. But totally agree that most women who actively pursue success get a raw deal from the press.

I was just happy that there was some logical reason for food weather. Even if that logical reason was some weirdo with a monkey.

I love your name.

Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. Hate that book. My dad made me watch the movie that came out a couple years ago, and it was ok because they actually gave a reason for food weather. The book as I remember it was like "These things just happen lol have some sky-corn." I have major food issues and a town where food…

So many Children's Bibles. And I would get them multiple years in a row FROM THE SAME PERSON. I mean all the stories are basically the same, but my one aunt seemed determined to get me Every. Last. One.

I triple checked my windows to make sure they were clown-proof, then also had a sex dream.

I DON'T WANT TO STAY WITH YOU, DUMBASS. I want to go home and relish the one night stand and never hear from you again. That's why it's called a one (count it, ONE) night stand.

I almost never judge the tattoo itself, but I have no problem calling out shoddy execution. My brother and I have the same tattoo, but we had different artists. His is bolder but not as sharp, mine is CRISP but a little fainter. My uncle once asked me if the artist had a few drinks after doing mine, before my…

I am a big fan of boy names for girls. And neutral names in general. I already know for a fact I will have a kid named Jude. I really like the name Brett on a girl, but I have an acquaintance named Brett and I don't want to name a kid after him.

I believe WAY more than just one crazy thing. I believe that aliens exist. I totally believe in ghosts. I believe that there was more to the JFK assassination than just Oswald shooting him. I talk to my cat; not sure if she understands me, but I do it anyway. I believe that most animals can sense emotional shifts in…

I have also never seen The Notebook. I told one of my guy friends this and he stared at me. Finally he said, "How have you never seen it? Every single one of my girlfriends has made me watch The Notebook with them." I asked him what he thought of it, and he said (no joke), "It is one of the greatest love stories of…

Wow. It is terrible...how blinded you are by your faith that you can't see the true war against Christians and Christmas! Christians can't wear their cross necklaces anymore because everyone will just think they are Madonna worshipers or hipsters. And now people are complaining that Christmas (the very reason for the…