Hey, Clayton...What the fuck did you just fucking say about Billy Haisley you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the…

Make fun all you want, but Peter Gammons is one of the world's busiest and foremost acronymologists. While we blather on and on, Gammons can fit 140 words into 140 characters.

These sabermetric acronyms are getting out of control.

What kind of second rate sports site would pay for a picture of a naked athlete?

While we're on the subject of people leaving lucrative jobs when others could easily replace them, why don't YOU fucking quit, Mike Florio.

[asks for God to show him a sign]
[closes eyes]
[opens eyes]
[sees sign]
[sign says "All You Can Eat - $6.99"]

-JaMarcus Russell

Haha God hates Antrel Rolle

"We didn't bring Sam in here to be a chip. I'm the only 'chip' here." - Chip Kelly, always yuks

I'd suggest we burn him, but it seems like he's already constantly on fire.

Come on man- cite your sources for fucks sake.

(Most of the) QBs Andre Johnson had during his career:
David Carr
Tony Banks
Dave Ragone
Matt Schaub
Sage Rosenfels
TJ Yates
Case Keenum
Ryan Fitzpatrick
Tom Savage

That is a fucking travesty. Andre Johnson put all-time great numbers with those guys throwing him the ball. We all saw what Larry Fitzgerald did with a couple years…

I think he just ethered the English language

#teamjoeytallywacker

My life is great. I really enjoyed sitting down with my family today and watching Chicago's point guards shoot 5-22 from the floor.

Well good God, something that bureaucratic certainly deserves a pirouette.

Derrick Rose wishes he could jump that high.

Yeah, think of all the other important, consequential stories we could have been posting at 10pm on a Thursday.

He's really having a Banner year.

THIS IS WARSAW!

Our kielbasa will blot out the sun!