I've posted this before, but it's once again approriate. My friend works for Cablevision. They have a nickname for Jim there. It's "Triple", as in. "He acts like he hit a triple, even though he was born on 3rd base."

The scariest thing about this post is that this guy is my doppleganger.

I worked at a chain drug store in high school and college. We had old people shit themselves constantly. Fortunately none of them ever dropped trow to do so.

In contemplating creating a few burners to star this more than once.

Im pretty sure the lady who broke into a run to pass him saw exactly what happened.

Agreed. With the force that the poop flew, it was coming whether he wanted or not. Granted, he could have found a better spot perhaps, but the launch sequence had been activated and there was no going back.

Gronk is exactly what Jeremey Shockey hoped to be, but was too much of an asshole to pull off. Gronk's personality is a mix between a 5 year old on a sugar high and a golden retriever puppy. He's impossible not to like, no matter how stupid the things he is doing are.

I'm not denying that. I've always been a fan of his stuff.

He's a Black guy with a Jewish name who plays White guy music while occasionally dressing like a Woman. He covers multiple demographics.

Take it from a hockey player, they are really hard to pull off. When we play pick up games we always try to hip check each other, and usually just end up wiping out.

What does that mean?

Sounds about right. He actually played Santa at our Christmas party one year, which made sense as he was fat and bearded. He grabbed a 16 year old figure skating instructor's tits, which resulted in her father coming in looking for him with a tire iron a few days later. He hid in the skate rental, and called 911. He…

No, Long Island.

I worked at an ice rink in high school, and the general manager was a fall down drunk. He was known to spend public skating sessions, which he hated with a passion, at the bar in the restaurant next door. He would keep in touch with us via walkie talkie, and over the course if the session, would grow more and more…

I remember reading once that OJ and Cowlings had identical Broncos, so everyone assumed Al was driving OJs truck because they were so used to seeing him in a white Bronco, when the one from the chase was actually Cowling's.

A few years ago, I was standing on line at a Dunkin Donuts on Long Island. I turned around at one point and Brad Pitt was standing behind me. I had heard rumors that he and Angelina, along with their gaggle of kids, were renting a house nearby while she was filming "Salt" on the Island, but here he was, Tyler Fucking…

4 games? Don't you think that's a bit stiff? It's not like he was planning on wearing Adidas cleats.

I don't want to know anyone who's idea of a good time is dressing up like Mike Francesa and hanging out which a bunch of other guys dressed like Mike Francesa.

They already have...

Mike Francesa's head would explode.