What does it rhyme with?? Dying to know now! Spill that tea Julia!

But being a regular person was the biggest con he ever pulled off. He was never a regular person. He was always a selfish, spoiled sociopath who couldn’t govern his way out of a cardboard box. A literal con man who has committed several crimes. Zero political experience would definitely hurt any candidate in the way…

10/10, would vote for Dave.

He was only “joking” when he “pretended to die” and hasn’t spoken a word since. It’s all about #owningthelibs! Jeeze, can’t you guys take a joke?

Yeah I’d rather him not dissolve congress or cancel the constitution, kthnx.

Is it too much to hope for a “Dave” situation, where he falls into a coma, gets replaced with a much better body double, actually solves problems, and then promptly dies?

Someone else who loves Marie Sharpe’s!! Hi friend! There is no other way to eat eggs/black beans and rice.

That is the coolest and sweetest thing I’ve ever heard.

Wow, your daughter sounds kick-ass! And that is really sweet how it all turned out for your dad. 

That’s mostly the only time I’m ever searching out a Starbucks - airport. Unless I’m flying through Seattle or something where I know there’s a good coffee place, it’s usually that or Dunkin’ Doughnuts. That or there is one conveniently in my driving route. 

“This book is written for those who share the same perverse tendency to engage in cooking as a loner spends time with his Xbox or a teenager with porn—ultimately as a delicious evasion of unpalatable realities.”

Perfect use of Larry David.

I’m positive that’s what he likes doing best. I mean, wouldn’t you? If you could just be incredibly silly and still make a gajillion dollars?

Click is pretty nice, and there’s a movie called Reign Over Me with Don Cheadle that’s a depressing deep cut for anyone that’s looking for a serious cry. 

Yes! Thank you for stanning 50 First Dates with me. Anytime he and Drew Barrymore get together it’s a treasure.

My husband loves all of the trash Adam Sandler comedies, including all of the Grown Ups sequels. It is something I make fun of him relentlessly for. But Little Nicky is one that I concede that I still find funny. Henry Winkler covered in bees!

Isn’t this LIT-ERA-LLY how we had gotten our last serial killer?? This exact scenario? And they ignored it!? JFC.

Let’s all forget Emilia Clark was also Sarah Conner, as it was entirely forgettable. I literally forgot I had seen it until I saw it on the other day, and went, oh yeah, I’ve seen this already. 

Yeah, it’s one of those things that I probably won’t forgive my dad for either. Luckily, I was outspoken *enough* to call him on that shit when I was going through it. But I didn’t get any backup from my mom at all, which is still a little hard. 

Oh hell no. If it is causing him that level of anxiety, he should write one of those celebrity “I’m getting off Twitter because it’s toxic” messages and leave. Literal HIV, calm down Miss Cleo.