Cmon, respect the man’s request: from here on out, Hustle Hamster it is.

Rob Ford’s Darryl Strawberry impression was much more spot-on.

No, wash cloths help to exfoliate the skin and remove bacteria that can be both harmful and the cause of lingering stank. Just rubbing soap on your body does not make one clean.

how many times exactly do I need to refresh before I get an article on Lane Kiffin banging Nick Saban's daughter? Geeze, has nobody checked the internet today?

Macklemore is the exact right answer for the next rapper to headline halftime at the Super Bowl because he is the most milquetoast piece of shit rapper with any popularity. Plus he’s white. Macklemore makes rap music for people who don’t like rap music.

The things is, the modeling doesn’t need to beat them 80% of the time. The top player in the world (per the linked article), is making an 8% return on his bets. Which is fantastic. But doesn’t represent anything near an 80% win rate.

Am I right or am I right?

Seriously, fuck Southern Nazarene’s coach.

Best part of that play? If the guy who fumbled had tried to pass (the announcers said he was the backup that was the likely intention), it would have been a penalty - the QB clearly tossed the ball forward on the initial “handoff.”

that was my thought exactly.

If you try to run a trick play while the defense plays with 10 men to honor a dead teammate, this deserves to happen to you.

“Who still has two thumbs and got to miss all of training camp, bitches?”

I did not know that gerbils had the "asshole burrowing" market cornered.

I would disagree somewhat. Middle class Torontonians don’t have cottages. Rich ass muthafuckers have cottages.

“Hey, collusions are part of the game. That’s why we wear helmets.”
- Emmitt Smith

Eh, to me, college sports always seemed more about someone’s love of the game than anything else, and thats why its fun to watch. Professional (with a few great exceptions) never seem to go as “balls to the wall” as college kids will. Granted, it doesn’t always work out well for the college players, but *shrug*

The saddest banner in the building is Jim Irsay’s Certificate of Sobriety from Promises.

OH UH UMM....We’ll go to a break.......we need an ambulance.....