For me, it was three weeks ago when I said fuck it, I need a positive change in my life. My mental health was damaged, and people were dragging me down.

Legitimately, I would read this. This is my goal. I want to write my own relationship book called Hey Thanks For The Sex, But Could You Leave Because I Prefer To Sleep Alone.

I don't have a great quitting story. yet.

Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter

I must go, my hovel needs me.

I find it really annoying when people write as their child, or pet, or fetus, or potted plant or whatever, especially when they're trying to be cute. It's not cute, stop. Also, it's 'allowed' not 'aloud'. If it was on purpose, it's not cute, if it wasn't on purpose it's still not cute and also sad.

Why don't they just put women in the cargohold with the rest of the property and be done with it?

The sudden realization that a fart turned into a shart?

Tried cocaine for the first (and last) time in a stranger's bedroom and ended up helping the caterer make a bunch of sandwiches. At a party I wasn't invited to.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

When I was in high school I had knee surgery on December 26 and the combination of immobility and hydrocodone made me super constipated and my mom had to give me an enema. At age 18. Worst NYE of my life.

"Obnoxiously safe"? Haven't you heard of the beer floodings?

Disappointed that "pearl scrunchie" isn't a euphemism.

Thanks for commenting, Doug and/or Les Moonves.

My car gets 40 rods to the hogshead, and that's the way I likes it.

Wanting oral sex != advertising for oral sex from a white, non-professional stranger in the guise of offering a ride.

And I am suddenly cured of that holiday-loneliness-based desire to go back on OKC.

Whoever figures out how to screen for these assholes on a dating site (maybe some type of super-intelligent, "oh god is it Skynet?" level of screening algorithm) is going to make a trillion dollars.

Maybe it's because I'm not a woman