...

I sent them this:

I mean, an adult wrote this, right?

Dick Tips

For some people that’s exactly the appeal. They want total power and control.

Weddings are dumb though. I mean, I’m married but I think it’s dumb. None of it is necessary and all of it is made up by people wanting to sell you things.

There’s a lot of fakes. There are dozens of emails from the whitehouse.gov domain, which doesn’t even host emails. White House people use the “eop.gov” for their emails.

The chances of this being the case are actually relatively high, given that Washington D.C. has the highest rate of membership of any city (and correspondingly, the hack released over 15,000 .gov or .mil email addresses).

Don’t worry Duggars, it’s all part of “gods will”.

Photo proof.

One time I flew from LGA to DCA on a 737 that had a total of 5 passengers on it. It was so cool, they let all of us sit in first class and we skipped the safety spiel and drank free liquor with the flight attendants.

My favorite quote was “If hoards of men started taking their wives’ surnames, it would be an unfortunate and perhaps irreversible step towards a matriarchal goddess culture, which blows for guys because those cultures used to routinely kill male infants and treat males like slaves. In a world where there are already…

man, life is so complicated. I think couples should make up a new last name when they marry. That might be fun.

That’s nice and all, but sometimes it’s impossible. Husband/wife - yeah, that’s one thing. But I have that circumstance with my mother in law - there’s very little to be done there except apologize.

I avoid going to dinners where my father pays because of this. He for some reason thinks every server should be at his beck and call, and (possibly because he is German) thinks 15% is a great tip. Once we went to dinner when my brother and I came into town at a fairly nice Mexican restaurant. It took the server maybe…

You never know why someone else is being quiet/the story on their relationship, or what the consequences might be for them at home for saying something in the restaurant; the dad who came back w the $50 sounds like a good guy.

Is there a second best option if it’s not a later apology and over-tip? For example the man with the ridiculous wife in the story above I can see her making his life miserable forever if he called her on it. She seems like the type of person who would blow up over what she is likely to spin as him taking the side of…

I tried it once. Said dick screamed at me louder than at the servers, and threw a saltshaker at me. Then yelled at the servers with increasing nastiness and impatience.

I support this comprehensively, but as an adult child of a miserable diner, I must say that these people are de facto losing propositions, confrontation-wise. If I stood up to my dad every time he was rude or incredulous or whatever, I’d never have a family meal. It’s why we go to the same fucking white people-Mexican…

Ah service jobs (food/retail/anything). Where pretty much everyone has at least one story that ends with “and then I went and cried in the bathroom.”