See, I’m from Canada.  I was with you right up until the end.  I can’t imagine what it’s like leaving the house to go to walmart and knowing in the back of your mind that you might get shot by some good guy with a gun. 

He feels shame, you see, because the Secret Service aborted the trip.

Use the seasonal department for checkout.  It’s the only way.

I feel like I’m living in a terrible remake of “When Harry Met Sally” because my girlfriend acts as if every check out line, doctor’s visit, TSA encounter is a novel encounter with completely unknown parameters. I look at her with a "You know you're slowly killing me right now, don't you?" I'm an anal retentive…

Shit we might be thinking of the same wal-mart

Not bad for a dude approaching his 125th birthday!

Nay, short season single A ball.

I see you've met my brother in law. He's even less pleasant than you'd think.

Any drive-thru, in front of me:

Its been my experience that nothing good ever happens when you wait until the last minute to start pulling things out.

I play polo-style from the golf cart without ever once stopping the cart completely. He knows nothing about slow play frustration.

He’s right about people in general, not just golfers. They don’t think ahead while in line. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been in a TSA security line and half the people walk up to the podium and only then start pulling out their ID and boarding pass. Or they don’t get out the credit card at the store until all…

Troll Patrol - dismiss on sight.

The bigger question is why Cuomo wasted seven minutes of airtime with a failed Kansas gubernatorial candidate who is barely clinging to his status as a public figure by being racist, defending racism, etc on live TV.

Obligatory.

Just shut up. This shit isnt even about you.

This was at a White Sox game chief.

TINA!

Sheer brilliance

Beautiful.