lol.

“If you’re looking to be politically correct in entertainment ... that’s the end of entertainment.”

My parents are physically affectionate enough (in a cute, totally publicly appropriate way) for me to assume that they are still sexually active. It does not freak me out. I’m not gonna ruminate on the visuals or anything, but it makes me happy that they’re still totally into each other. I’m happy that my parents are…

I’m also reminded of that Louis CK schtick about cuddling. To paraphrase poorly: if you do it right, she should high five you and go to sleep. If she’s cuddling it’s because you haven’t given her orgasms.

Right? Actually now that I think of it, it happened twice this past week. On Sunday he was mowing the lawn and I was making lunch so I offered and he said no. And then on Monday I made grilled cheese for the kids and he unexpectedly popped in on his way to a mill and turned down grilled cheese. Grilled effing cheese!…

If your husband is doing anything other than either sleeping or trying to remember his native tongue directly after sex, you’re probably doing it wrong.

Well, sure, if your man has to go out and buy his own sandwiches, he'll likely cheat on you with a minor.

Negative previous experiences. Lack of access. Finances. Fear. Lack of time. Lack of support. The list is a lengthy one.

Because it takes months to get in, it costs loads of money, even with insurance because a single tylenol costs $400, and because most doctors aren’t Dr House and don’t end up finding out what’s wrong with you until 4 years later because they always pick the easiest option instead of running full tests, etc etc.…

I can’t decide if this is supposed to be kinda snarky or not. I browsed RealSelf extensively last year while I was preparing for my boob job and lipo and it helped a lot because I could read about other women’s experiences. For me, a surgery being “worth it” was not only about the visible results, but also about the…

The Camry driver may have been comatose due to an attack of extreme boredeom.

Easy. Don’t act like an asshole while wearing it.

They look like Ellen Pompeo upon realizing that her latte was made with sour milk.

Ugh off-brand Haim sister is the BEST COMPLIMENT EVER BRAVO

I used to be obsessed like that and quit cold turkey. After like six months I had one at a restaurant and was like wtf is this weirdly sweet chemical water??

They look like how I expect Madonna to look in twenty years.

I think it's due to having so little body fat. Not even being snarky. If you're body fat % falls below a certain level, there just isn't much there to fill in the skin and it can give the face a prematurely wrinkled look.

yeah but do you get PAID for your job?? Idk unpaid internships are basically free labor and they piss me off

what’s wrong w doing heroin, man