Thanks so much for your response. The biggest problem with the conversation about the potential for decriminalization causing damage to trafficked women is that women who are trafficked aren’t sex workers. They’re victims of rape, torture and kidnapping. No potential trafficker is holding back because he’s worried…

First, people aren’t pretending that women are making a choice. If someone is not being trafficked, and is doing sex work, it is something they literally have chosen to do, as in decided “this is the best thing for me at the moment” and then proceeded to do it. There’s no pretending about it.

That’s a fair distinction. I think people just are truly made to be able to do different things, even things that make us go “yikes”. I used to have all kinds of opinions on how being an outdoor sex worker must just be the worst option ever....until I met some and they very kindly told me that it’s the best choice for…

I can answer that! My answer comes from a super, super privileged place, though, so take it in the context of a white,cis,middle class person who has no dependents:

Well, you’re right. There are definitely differences. When a long haul trucker is assaulted, she can go to the police and while she may still face rape stigma, they probably won’t say it was theft of services or arrest her. She can also talk about her job, including the dangers of it, without people trying to rescue…

Thank you.

I don’t mean to be all over you and respond to all your posts. I’m not a creep, I swear. But I couldn’t help responding to this one, too, as it is probably the #1 thing people think about sex work (ok, maybe #2, with sex work = trafficking being #1). Hillary Clinton even gave a quote a few years ago about how squicked…

From reading the comments, there seems to be confusion about sex work vs. trafficking. Children do not do sex work. People brought into this country with false promises and then held captive do not do sex work. Women who are sold into captivity do not do sex work. All of that is rape, kidnapping, and torture.…

I’m curious if you also worry about long haul truckers and female bartenders’ safety, as those are two of the most dangerous jobs for women. And do you feel angry for models, dancers, and athletes who also use their bodies as objects? One knee injury and a dancer is no longer of value to anyone. Her body and skill are…

I’m a sex worker (although I am phasing this out so I can focus on the career sex work helped to pay for). I’ve been in the industry for 16 years, so I think my sample size is probably large enough for me to say that your perceptions are wrong. Or, rather, your generalization is wrong.

I’m a woman and had a profile that I actually used. I can’t imagine I’m that much of an anomaly, other than every time I used it I was single (looking for NSA kinky stuff wasn’t working out on other sites).

I’m a (newish) lawyer, and by no means a legal genius, but this seems so open and shut. If this was really about a sincerely held religious belief, she would have to say that she is denying everyone marriage licenses because they can be granted to interfaith couples, couples stemming from adultery, and couples like…

The worst part was that I had totally blocked it out and it then all came flooding back to me. It was also one of the times my stepmom had been the angriest with me (she found me in a hotel hot tub with a 24 year old and I was 15 but he thought I was 18) and brought it up for years afterward, reminding me how I had…

My stepmother was a Buddhist, so when she died we had a celebration of life instead of a traditional funeral/wake/etc. The food spread was pretty phenomenal and there was an open bar which I think led to some of these really awkward, inappropriate comments:

I’m a non-bot woman who has had an account on Ashley Madison on and off for a few years. The main issue I had with it was that most of the men in my city who contacted me and/or looked interesting wanted what would amount to a dating relationship while staying married. I was not there to fall in love/commit to…

I used to agree with what most people are saying: if the sex part of your marriage is dead, talk to your partner about fixing it, opening up or divorcing, otherwise you’re a shitbag. I still think that’s solid advice, but I was a side piece for two years and came out of it with a little more compassion for people who…

This happened in my high school, too. A popular English teacher was accused of raping multiple students and got a bunch of his favorites to sign a petition saying how much he was liked. He’d been savvy and only gone after girls with “bad reputations” and he was a Dead Poets Society type, so we all rallied around him.…

The couple in my story - my ex and his wife - are making it work only because he cheated and never got caught. If he’d had to be lonely/dissatisfied for 7 years, he would have gotten a divorce. At the end of that time, he decided to just learn how to deal with infrequent sex since he decided his marriage meant more…

Oooh that sounds so hard. I’m sorry that you’re going through that!

I totally agree. I was with a married man for two years who cheated for five before that and it absolutely saved his marriage. His wife’s sex drive crashed when he was 38 and she didn’t want to talk about it and she ditched counseling after one session, so he started seeing escorts. When we were together, he was in a…