I seriously don’t get why it’s only called birth control. Pharmaceutical companies could easily get around stupid conservative shit by labelling it hormone therapy.

Catching dick? Is that a new spwhorting even?

It’s cute how football fans think somehow subsets of football fans are more loathsome than other sets of football fans.

I don’t like Jennifer Lawrence. Not because of this, but just in general. It’s not so much a dislike as an “eh”. Perhaps someone can explain the attraction to me. She just seems be another “manic pixie dream girl”.

Remember, folks, punching someone who thinks Chrisopher Marlowe or the Earl of Oxford wrote the plays is legal in all English speaking countries!

When I found out he was hosting again, I squealed. Ricky can host all of the awards shows for all I care. He does it so well.

My boyfriends text when it was announced he was hosting:

I can’t see Burt Reynolds’ name without missing Rebecca Rose.

Today I learned that Martin Sheen is Charlie Sheen’s father and also that Martin Sheen is not Michael Douglas.

Every day around 1ish-noonish-something, donut shops and bakeries close their doors. And that means that everyday millions of Americans must go without fresh donuts in the afternoon. They are forced to go to capitalistic donut chains that donought value their customers. Not only that, but at a certain hour of the…

you know that Adam Levine has one of those voicemails where he says “hello?” And pauses and makes you think he actually answered the phone and then he says “just playin you know what to do”

I got in a solid 30 seconds of “well helooooo, Tarzan” before the horrible niggling part of me wondered where Tarzan gets trousers.

regular reminder that all babies look the same

I disagree with Senator Graham on pretty much all the issues, but out of all the people running for the Republican nomination, he’s always struck me as the most competent, serious, and reasonable candidate (arguably because he’s never been in any of the main-stage debates). Which says a lot about the rest of them.

I HAVE AN IDEA

Truthfully, no lives matter. We did nothing after Sandyhook. Kinda shows that we don’t care who dies, even little kids. Once you’re okay with that, the discussion ends.

I just felt like we needed a full shot of Rebel looking fucking BOSS in this dress. ALSO HER BAG IS A CANDY. She looks like Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century went to a fancy party and I love it.

I’ve always made it a point to avoid these types of videos, but then I thought of all the mothers who lay awake at night wondering if their sons will come home, the women who wait by the phone to hear their husbands or boyfriends on the other end of the line, my family waiting to get that phone call that my brother…