Orange really is the new black- I see it now.

Letting your kids believe in Santa:

Back in the late 90s, I was working at a small Christian newspaper and over the four years I stayed there my evangelical Christian boss, became more and more engrossed with demons that infested our workplace. Problems were never just problems, but troublesome demons determined to slow the good work he was doing. For…

I quit Jehovah's Witnesses at 23. Moved out of my grandmother's house and into my non-JW boyfriend.

A year and a half ago, I joined a Japanese company that made things like non-sexual adult dolls and nazi war plane scale models (I, too, am still asking myself "what the fuck?"). I used a recruiter to find the job, telling him that I wanted to be a translator. The company said that they needed a bilingual person to…

Ohh! I used to work for Barnes and Hurrrgggh when I was trying to finish my Master's thesis, and we always had this fantasy that it was slightly better at Borders. I guess not! I worked there for three months or so. I actually liked working in the children's section and the literature section, where I was originally…

I'll actually be celebrating a one year anniversary of my big day of quit on the 13th of this month....it wasn't a job I quit though. I was in a very toxic and emotionally abusive marriage for 19 years, which fueled my hereditary alcoholism....making me pretty damn miserable to the point of going to sleep at night…

I quit a cult and half my family when I was 16. I grew up in the cult. Think Jehovah's Witness, but a bit weirder. I went to this fundamentalist church's private school where I got straight As but was mostly disliked by the other students for being a goody-two shoes. I studied the Bible all the time, was not allowed…

I am prodigiously good at quittin' shit. Been doing it since I was a lil bay bay. But a personal favorite was my childhood tennis lessons. We were broke, but I think my parents thought it'd be a classy interest to pursue (?). I was eleven and socially awkward and terrified of my cute instructor. Once it was…

When I was a wee lass I was just as obnoxiously political as I am now, so at a very young age I decided that I wasn't going to eat meat any more for reasons that probably only make sense to a 5 year old. After what I'm sure was an impassioned and nonsensical speech the conversation with my parents went like this:

This is a long one, but here goes. I was in high school. It was a new charter school for the arts, and I was one of the biggest earners for donors, because I am a professional singer/songwriter/guitarist. Nearly every weekend and often during the week, they would send me out to sing for potential donors. I raised tens…

This is somewhere between a breakup and a quitting story.

Actually, it's my worst quitting story. Starts back in 2000, when I met an incredible 19 year old boy who also happened to do backyard wrestling. (Anyone snickering and looking down their thick specs is being hit with a metal folding chair in my imagination). Anyway, to my 20 year old self this was some kickass, DIY…

I was working in medical supplies. I brought in about ten million dollars a month for my company and did the order processing, billing and sterilization of medical supplies. Also set up the builds with the product manager and handled inventory with 7 international warehouses, the smallest of which had over 2 million…

I joined a cult while I was in college (that's another story that you can hear some of here: http://ia801801.us.archive.org/26/items/SSWAH…) and then I left it two years later.

My friend and I worked in the photo department of a Genovese Pharmacy. We had a terrible manager so we started coming up with ideas of how we would quit. She went with a singing telegram dressed like a gorilla with a bow in her hair. The lyrics were brilliant:

I worked for a big hotel chain when I was young and got my vacation denied (the only one I'd asked for after working every other damn holiday) so that the manager and her BF the assistant manager could go on a last minute vacation themselves.

I have so many stories about quitting, because I was a huge goddamn loser for half my life.